worth repeating...

well, here we are... sunday mornin... sittin on my beach steps...coffee at my side... the way i like to start each day, most definitely. today i'm a lil unsure of what's going to be comin out of me... so, let me just say...whatever it is... thanks for reading it. i've been doin this for almost 2 years now, and i gotta say, it's been a fun interesting experience, just writing and throwin it out there for whoever wants to read it. it's one of those feelings that's kinda funny...when i hit publish, many things go through my head... thinkin of each person that reads it, how they're gonna take it...take me, really. i usually feel pretty hyped up, wondering how many people will peruse my words and get something from them...or how many people will be rolling their eyes at me...how many people might know exactly where i'm coming from...how many people will just think i'm a touchy, feely stupid girl :) it's kinda crazy, you know? having to just let it go, and publish it anyways... like tearing off a bandaid...or getting into a cold pool... you just have to do it quickly and know that that uncomfortable part only lasts for a second. which sorta brings me to a thought i had the other day... fresh from sleep... i woke up, with this thought in my head... a thought that i knew that what i should do is get up and write it down... because it was really clear at that very moment... of course, i didn't write it down, and later that day i was runnin the trails with a friend of mine, and as we run, we talk and tell each other jokes, stories, feelings, and sometimes things that we wouldn't tell other people, maybe... because when you're there, running, hoppin over roots and duckin under tree limbs, sweatin, you're at the most clearest spot in your thinking, it seems...what's inside of you, will come out easier...like that push that you're puttin out there, propelling your body forward and up and over objects...it's all easy compared. i can't really say that i've had many runner's highs...being that i'm as slow as a tortoise...haha...one of my friend's always likes to say, i think just to make me feel better...'honey, slow and steady wins the race.' thank god for that friend :) haha! anyways, back to my thought...sorry...i get a lil side-tracked. it happens. anyways, i woke up with the thought of language...and of words... of the simple words or phrases that mean so much. the fact that hearing them or saying them can make the biggest difference in our lives. that the repetition of them, no matter what...is way better than never hearing them or saying them at all. that certain phrases or words that are put together, are said in so many different ways. they are said out of anger, out of love, out of goofyness, out of sadness, out of jealousy... so, so, many reasons and differences... but they all come back to the same thing. that no matter what, there are some days, that we just have to have a lil faith and say them...if we feel them. now i thought about writing the phrases of which i'm talking about... but then that would make it too easy, wouldn't it? maybe it would be better for us to just keep those phrases to ourselves, but to know that they're there...inside of us. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... then again... nah... here are the one's, that for me, are worth repeating, as often as possible... with sincerity, with clarity, and with conviction... these little words, can be the biggest thing ever... it's how we use our words...how we live our words...how we put them into action, and just be the words... because as we know, words are words, they're just letters thrown together... we are the one's that can make them mean something. we can either make them powerful or make them meaningless. i guess that's what makes me love reading certain authors...you know, the one's that when you read a passage, you think to yourself, 'wow, that's amazing', that words can take you somewhere...make you feel everything... or wish that you could feel nothing because of the way they do make you feel. i think we've all probably been there...when you wish you could say or write the exact thing that is welling up inside of you, and all that comes out is something bumbly and gibberishy...haha...yes, as you walk away or look back at those moments that you wish you had the words, or you had hoped to be so much more eloquent...and yet there we are...later...thinking of the exact thing we should have said...and think...'why didn't i say that?' or 'why did i have to look so foolish?'...haha! oh, man, being human is a fuckin funny thing. just so full of mis-steps, and stumbles, and face-plants... but the grand part of it all is... the day that you say just the right thing... or write it in a note... or simply show someone you care...that you're there...or that you've been there. so, the words for me, that are worth repeating, generously...are these... i love you. thank you. i'm sorry. i was wrong. i'm here. i'm still here. how was your day? it's really good to see you. it's ok. it's gonna get better. you look beautiful. you're amazing. great job. i believe in you. i'm proud of you. i need you. keep your head up. i love you. oh, right, i already wrote that...i think these words should be used to excess...so, yeah, worth repeating. i think that the funny thing is...that those phrases, to me, are so important...and look, look at them...very short...very simple...and very to the point. no need to embellish. no need for a thesaurus. just right. there's a girl in my yoga classes that has a tattoo that says, 'love wastefully'. i asked her about it one day, because right in the middle of class, i noticed it, and ended up thinkin about it non-stop through out class...yeah, i know, i obviously wasn't concentrating on my practice. haha! but those words, those words...nice... i believe them... that no matter what... what's happening in your life... we should give them to some one... and yes, that doesn't mean that you're goin to get them in return... the person that you give them to, could very well, crumple those words up and toss them out. but then again, it could be the exact thing they need to hear, at that very moment. it might be the exact thing that you need to do...god, who knows? but in this life that's our very own, you know that sayin, "it's in the trying"? well, honestly, maybe it is... maybe after all of those times that you use your words, wisely, and yes, sometimes, very unwisely, if that's even a word. maybe after all that... maybe it will all start making sense... and maybe those words will come back to you, ten-fold... who knows? i think that maybe we just can't be afraid to use them...wastefully. but if you say them... wastefully. mean them. because after all...we are the one's that can make them mean something. either way... do just that... mean something. so, my waking thought, was orginally, just that there are certain words in the english language, that when put together, are worth repeating, maybe a million times over...and man, i can honestly say, they are very worth hearing as well. say them, write them, scream them, laugh them... over. over. and over. don't be afraid. after all, they're just words, right? haha! righhhhhhhhhhhhhht, righhhhhhhhhhhhht :)