Wednesday, April 16, 2014

+'s

soooooooooooooooo, here I sit...
cup of chicory, steaming next to me...
the day is cloudy, damp, and wildly windy...for an april day in florida...
my washer churning away, washin off the week's sweat and tears...(I know what you're thinkin, it's only Wednesday, the week is only half way gone, but alas, i'm a slinger, the last six days have been chock full of slingin...yep yep...life of a service girl)
but...as it is my day off, and if I were telling the truth, right here, right now...
I could actually admit that it's okay that it's that way...
that sometimes a cloudy, dreary day is a welcomed day in sunny florida...
then as all of my friends and I agree with, you don't have to feel guilty about staying indoors and sprawlin out....right?!  righhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhht :)
because when that sun does choose to come out, and the waves are rolling in, the birds are chirping, bees are buzzing, breeze is blowing just enough....yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, those days, it's hard to stay in and feel okay about it.
you feel as if you should just jump on the closest bike and ride through your neighborhood, or ride downtown...
as if you should go to the beach and breathe all that salt air that you can...
as if eating outdoors is the only rational choice...
heck...there were days that I've been thinkin about recently, in Portland, that if the sun came out, i'd quickly walk out my door and just lean against my lil cube, close my eyes, and dream of warmth and sunlight and life...
yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh :)
it's truly amazing what a lil sunshine will do to your attitude, your soul, your mind, your body!
it's the change in all things good!
it's funny, but I sat down to write something completely different today, but find myself clinging to the thoughts of my love for sunshine...
of the fact that, most of the year, i'm dreaming of summer...hahahahhaha!
I truly am!
it's unavoidable!
there's something about summer time that feels like a constant celebration to me.
I think of the past few years of my life...and mostly my favorite moments have been spent with an amazing crew of people...playing and lounging and drinking and singing and dancing and swimming and boogie boarding (yep, i'm the dorky 46 year old that loves my boogie board, immensely!  haha!)
in fact, my board is leaning against the wall in my living room...
it's kind of its permanent resting spot, til I use it again...
and in those warm water days that I love so dearly, sometimes it's what gets me through my day at work, if i'm on the morning shift, I drive down our lil beach road, hopin that there are a few waves, callin my name...
that childlike experience of pushing myself off into one and feeling the water splash into my eyes, and hold me til i'm touching the sand with my hands...
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, yessssssssssssssssss, it makes me smile right this moment...
but I can recall, just smiling as I get back up and slide back out to catch the next one...
doesn't matter at all if i'm the only one on the beach that day.
that salt water is the ultimate cleanser of all bad things in your day...
it can make you forget the shit that happens along the way.
and here's the thing...
I was talkin to a friend of mine the other day...
and we were discussing work, I think, about being frustrated or just feeling disgruntled, which, of course bled into talkin about other things that get on our nerves...
she was asking for advice about what to do...is this right? or is that right?  choices and decisions...frustrations and disappointments...fears and commitment...
too much to worry over somedays!!!! 
so, I was sittin there, thinkin of what the right thing to say was...and this is what came to me...
I think that sometimes, it's easy to get pressed into the minuses of our life...we see them and they seem to multiply, like lil babies or something...we can get caught up in them, feelin like they're takin over our lives...but here's the thing we have to remember...we must remember!  at the end of the day, there are also pluses...we all have them...sooooooooooooo, we need to think about these pluses, say them out loud even...
on any given day, if you're walkin into whatever you're walkin into...
carry those pluses with you...
I told her that she always had a few pluses in her pocket...no matter what.
and when that moment comes, that overwhelming moment of minus...
just reach down in that pocket and pull out those pluses...
they are there...like a sword of light, to fight off whatever is coming after you.
so, maybe right now, while you're reading this (and if you are, thank you, oh so very much!) make a lil mental list of your pluses...
sometimes they are ever changing...but there are some that are the constant pluses...I think that maybe those are the ones that we should put in our back pockets and walk into our days with...
yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, I do believe it's true :)
one of mine is...you guessed it...is that beach that's across the street from me...
can't imagine my life without it.
plus :)


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